neyronrose (neyronrose) wrote,

about S. and AE and my perceptions

I was even trying to think up a good subject heading (it was "rambling as usual"), and then I told myself I was once again being ridiculous.  I am curious about whether any members of AfterElton are actually reading this, but I wouldn't care as far as being self-conscious.  I feel like there, on that site aimed at covering things gay and bi men find interesting in pop culture, I'm doing the Internet equivalent of saying things to people's faces.  I can have complete confidence that the guys will tell me if they disagree with me.  It feels remarkably like saying things to S.'s face.  S. usually agrees with me on things I say about gay culture and issues, but I know he'll have no hesitation in disagreeing with me if he feels the need.  S. is quite aware that I believe that he knows what he's talking about considerably better than I know what I'm talking about, because I'm just observing it and he's living it.

I was shocked to hear recently that currently 45% of AfterElton members are women.  A lot of the guys were shocked, too.  I never officially registed my gender on my profile, so I don't think I'd even be counted.  The consensus seemed to be that women were coming there for Glee news.  I was hanging around with gay men when I was in college twenty years ago, so my loyalties precede that, but I'm sure it's true for some members.  I lurked on AE reading articles and columns about Verbotene Liebe and Alles was zaehlt for a couple of months at least before I joined as a member.  AE is family-friendly, not that it would be too much of a problem for me if it wasn't.  I figure it's comforting to some.  What it means to me is that I have trouble even describing some of the books I read in family-friendly terms.  I have resorted to saying, "Read the warnings on the publisher's site."

I explained about "lemon" and "lime" to Larkin.  She was already reading lemon.  She just didn't know that it was called that.  I've read yaoi-influenced romances, but I don't even remember exactly what the order of the names before and after the slashes indicates.  I know that for yaoi it means seme and uke, but I don't remember if it's the first name or the name after the slash that's seme (or uke).  People get indignant if someone writes it and doesn't know.  I just like it if the romances switch things up, but that's me.

There's fiction, and there's fiction about fiction, and there's non-fiction.  I feel like I have a decent enough grasp on it.  A bit of it is that I know I'll be told if I'm wrong.  Just about all of the people I talk to like fiction and non-fiction.  It just worked out like that.  A. has his clubbing adventures, and then they become stories.  S. has his share of adventures that become stories.  The non-fiction narratives become entertainment, and A. and S. are well aware of it.  I know it's people's lives, but they both enjoy telling stories.  S. has an excellent feeling for whether something he says might end up here.  My life is pretty quiet, but I tell narratives about myself here and there.  Mostly mine is observation, though.  The people who know me know I enjoy fiction, too.  I feel much less constraint when it comes to fiction.  Well, I don't feel that much constraint when it comes to S.'s stories.

I've said before that I want my secret love child to take me to the Bike Stop and introduce me as his mother.  S. doesn't think it would become as funny a story as I think it would be.  Maybe he doesn't feel like a leather bar would be a good place to tell that kind of fiction, but I'm sure people have told fiction there before.  Maybe I'll get there someday, but not as his fictional mother.  That's a story I'll have to give up on.

I told S. that I judge a m/m romance as bad if I start wondering if the author had ever actually met a gay man.  He thought that was hilarious.  I was serious.
Tags: gay-related, m/m, rambling, reading, tv

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