neyronrose (neyronrose) wrote,

interesting discussion about bisexuality

It's at Teddypig's place, The Naughty Bits:  I think Teddypig and I are actually agreeing on all the points of the "men are pigs" part of the discussion.  We're agreeing on a number of other points as well, as far as I can tell.  We tend to believe that women who say they're bisexual really are -- well, I definitely believe that.  Because really, who's going to say that if she doesn't want to have sex with a woman?  Lots of women who've been with men fall in love with women and from then on identify as lesbians or bisexual.  Some just don't want labels and say they happen to be in love with the person.  I've said that about the falling in love before.

As I said on The Naughty Bits, I think a lot of men, straight, gay, or bi, are just looking for quick hookups and that some of those pretty much straight guys don't care if it's a man or a woman.  So they're open-minded in their piggy way, but most of those straight guys would have sex with a woman, given the choice.  I would guess there are a few who just want it a little different, or a little rougher, on occasion, then they'd have with a wife or girlfriend.  The closeted gay guys out looking for sex aren't really able to have a serious emotional connection with a man at that point.  Maybe after they come out of the closet and then after the experimenting with the variety of men stage, they'd be ready.  Or likely some will just want to keep up with the quick hookups, because that's what they're used to.

Do I think it's likely for an openly bisexual man to have a primary emotional relationship with a man?  I think it would be fairly uncommon.  I think it would be much more likely for even an openly bisexual man to have a girlfriend and have quick hookups with men.  There's still a lot of social pressure.  Do I believe a bisexual man could be in a serious relationship with a woman and be monogamous?  Again, I would think it rare, but possible.

But I've mentioned before that in a romance, which I am aware is fiction, I much prefer a man to be bisexual to start with rather than turn from straight to gay.  Whether it's a m/m romance or a m/m/f menage, I want the guys to be at least bi, and have a clue about manlove.  In a romance, I'm happy with a bi man forming a monogamous relationship with another man, as unlikely as that would be on a couple of levels in real life.  It's more likely to me than someone changing orientations completely for that one special guy.

Tags: lgbt, rambling

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